Family

I cannot imagine how difficult life would be without family. I am so glad I don't have to try! I have the most loving and supportive family I could ever hope for. They are also the smartest, best-looking, and funniest family. If you don't believe me, just ask us! I just spent the last few days with my kids and grandkids, and I am filled to overflowing with love and pride. God has been very good to me.

Hannah's Birthday!

My little Hannah is already 2 years old! I am excited to go celebrate with her and all the family. Babies are babies for such a very short time. As a grandma, I wish I could slow it down so I wouldn't feel like I have missed so much; but as parents, the timing is probably just about right. I remember being ready for my kids to turn two and move towards being able to communicate with me more and grow in independence. Each step towards adulthood has an element of saying good-bye, but it also is saying hello to a new person each day. I love the adults my babies have become and still get to witness their growing faith as they change into the people that God designed them to be. It is fun to see the emerging person unfolding in little Hannah. What a beautiful person she is already with only 2 years behind her!

Fast

Fast, breakfast, fasten, color-fast, faster, fast food, fast girl, fasting, fastidious, hold fast, fastest, fast and furious, fastigiate, fastigium, steadfast

Just thinking about the word fast. It means to do without food, move at high speed, and be stuck or immoveable, among many other things. Why do we use the same word for opposite things? I started the Lenten season as a student of Lutheranism. I was trying to get into the "feasts and seasons" and the liturgies and parts of the church I had rejected as a younger Christian. I was, after all, on a journey of possibly becoming a ministers' wife in the Lutheran church, so I wanted to be open-minded and learn more about things I did not understand. So I began the lenten season as many folks do - giving something up as I turned to God and remembered all He gave up for me. I chose to give up sugar, not in a strict sense, but to reject foods that did not have anything going for it other than sugar. This was a good choice (or bad choice if you look at it differently) because I am a sugar addict. I was quite strict about this at first, and whenever I was tempted to eat something I shouldn't, I would pray for strength and receive it. I lightened up for social occasions, like Steve's birthday. When I found out I was in a very bad dream and suddenly was awakened to the fact that the ministers' wife journey was fake, I completely jumped off the Lutheran ship and dived right into a sea of sugar. I thought I was drowning at first, but I remembered to pray in spite of breaking the sugar fast, and I am back on land. After a few weeks (I think - I am in a bit of a time warp), I went back to the Lutheran church in Marion where I started this lent thing, not for lenten group or for worship, but to talk to the Director of Spiritual Transformation (cool title, isn't it?). I had made this appointment with her back in January, not really knowing why. This is how long it takes to get in to see her, and now I know why I needed to see her. She is an amazing Christian woman, and I confided in her. She helped me see my own heart, that all I really want is to know God more and understand my place in His heart. I am an important part of this fastigiate body of His, just as we all are. My soul is steadfast in Him, and I will not fail. I rarely actually "hear" His voice, but it doesn't stop me from listening and He always answers. I don't have to hear it to know it. Two days ago, I ate a Klondike bar without any guilt, and it was good. I have not had any sugar since. Doesn't matter if I do or don't. The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning. Great is Thy faithfulness! "The Lord is my portion," says my soul. Therefore I will hope in Him.

Guess where I was?

Within 15 minutes, I tied 9 shoes, helped solve 3 "tragedies" worth crying over, got at least 10 hugs, and heard "Mrs. Bailey, watch this!!" about 50 times from all directions. Did you guess where I was? Afternoon recess with Kindergartners! It was wonderful!

Spring break is over

Spring break was a great time to be with family and friends. It was great to be with the Powers and Clark families in Polk City - walking downtown to the park was my favorite; it is like walking back in time to a place where I was a young mom raising kids. We often ventured out to find a playground or just walk around town. I usually did not have any money so I could not take the kids for an ice cream treat when they were little. So that is what we did on Spring Break - the kids and grandkids and I all walked downtown and got ice cream treats then played at the playground in the middle of the town square. It was one of my favorite parts of the week - simple pleasures. I love my family.

Now Spring Break is over and I am back to work and loving it. Being with all the little kiddos is really wonderful -every day is rich with simple pleasures.

1John 3 How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!

Heart Armor

The most common complaint from my little counselees is that someone is "being mean" to them (saying mean things, talking bad about them to others, giving dirty looks). With all the many complaints, you would think the world is completely full of meanies. Actually, the same kids complaining are the ones being complained about. It is a lot about perception. So I teach kids to put on the "heart armor." I ask them to picture a knight in his armor and how since they are wearing all that metal, arrows can't hurt them. Heart armor is something you keep in your heart that protects us from the flaming arrows of mean words and dirty looks. If you keep your heart armor strong, mean words and looks can just bounce off you and fall to the floor. Are you ready to put that armor on? OK, then repeat after me "No matter what... they say or do...I am still....a wonderful person!" I let them change the word "wonderful" to any word that they use to describe something that they think is great (awesome, amazing, sweet, cool, fantastic, etc.)

Ephesians 6:10-17 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world, and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

No matter what they say or do, I am still God's precious child.

Helping children

When kids tell you things about their world that make you shudder, you have to report it - it is the law. It's not that I don't WANT to report it - of course I do! I want help for the kiddos- they should not have to live like this. The problem is that our best recourse for family problems seems to be retribution. I wish that families knew that when their problems are reported, there will be help for them. Why is it that when we help, it doesn't feel like help? How do you make "helping" feel good to the helped? It is National Social Worker Week, and I am extrememly thankful for the social workers out there. It has to be the hardest job - they are on the front lines of a war we are losing. Social workers go into the field because they love people. They see the social problems and want to make a difference. Unfortunately, the system we have in place for them to do their job is extremely flawed, and I know it makes their work even tougher. I do not pretend to know how I might change this system. But I can clearly see that we consider "help" is not being interpreted that way.

I have a family at my school that despises me right now. I had to make a report and I handled it with them in the gentlest, most compassionate way that I know how. They have complained about me to the principal and forbid their child to see me. They are fighting it and it feels terrible. Yesterday, the case worker called me to see if I had any other information that I wanted to add. I wanted to say no, but I couldn't. I felt like Jim Carrey in "Liar" when he was telling the police officer about all the times he broke the law, and the officer said, "Is there anything else?" He tried to say no, but couldn't and said a very pained, "YEESSS!" and opened the glove box full of traffic tickets. So I had to tell her more that I had learned that is relevant to the case. I don't know how much uglier this situation will get. She said "do you want to be listed as reporter or as by your name? I said it doesn't matter. It will be obvious to them that it was me that reported. I wish I could think that my reporting will help matters. I have to believe that it will help the little girl. But I wish I knew how to help the family, because if the family isn't helped, how can this little 6 year old get better? Kids are designed to copy their parents. She is probably going to come to school hating me just like her parents do. I have already watched this happen with another family that I "helped."

Until someone comes up with a better paradigm, I will keep playing by this system; it is the best we have ever had. I just wish there were more adoptive parents out there right now. There are so many children whose parents are losing custody and not enough places for the children to go. There is one girl right now whose Mom is about to lose her. She has been staying with a grandma who is not biologically connected to her and only remotely socially connected; she was only "keeping" her temporarily until mom could get her back. It is not going to happen. I want to bring her home so bad. She writes me love notes every day. All she wants in life is a mommy to love her. It is not looking like it is going to happen.

No comment necessary. I am just venting today. I am ready to face another day with a smile on my face and I will love the little children as best as I can for the time that I have with them.